Stupidity at its finest

When will I ever learn? The answer to that is probably never.

I stalked his ex again and came to a really intense post about her being unfair because she wasn't willing to give him another chance. About not letting people in and building walls to those closest to you.

What does this mean? Is this why he has been so distant to me?

Because he had come to the realisation that I'm not everything I turn out to be? That I'm an embarrassing disappointment that he cannot bare to be around? And that going back to his ex was a better option than being with me.

There is so much I can lie to myself about, and lying about how this does not hurt me is a fucking joke. I don't need this now. I don't need this ever.

If you're sick of me, let me know.

I let you in, only for you to destroy what little confidence I had in myself. Thinking that you actually had an interest in me, only for me to find out that I was not enough. And most likely never will be.

Once these exams are done, I need clarification in order to move on. I need a reason as to why you would use me like so, a reason to hate you.

Actually, I don't think I could hate you. Just resent the ideas you put in my head.

Ideas that I was actually worth something.